01 - THE BEGINNING OF EVERYTHING

It was a Saturday morning, when I could hear the unmistakable voice of my pastor, leader of one of the most acclaimed Pentecostal groups in the neighborhood where he lived, calling me out loud. As soon as I noticed his presence and the hurried way in which he invited me to meet him, I was able to deduce immediately what it was about before I even heard the details of his visit.

— The peace of the Lord Jesus, my beloved brother, I bring you news about that subject that we discussed a few days ago!

— Peace in Christ, beloved pastor! Please come in, let's have a coffee

— Ah, yes, very good, I really am a big lover of a very hot caffeine!

— Peace, Pastor Miguel, I will prepare a fresh coffee for you!

— Peace, Sister Lourdes, pleased to see you again. And the children, how are they?

— They are great, pastor, take the opportunity to play a little in the yard

— That's good. But I want to go ahead with the reason for my visit to you so early, because the subject is very urgent and delicate

— So don't waste any more time, my brother, get to the point!

— Okay, Brother Vinicius, I came here to tell you that I brought my president my intention to recommend you to take on one of our congregations in the field, I hope you will accept the challenge

— Oh, my God, Vinicius, we cannot accept this proposal!

— But why not, my sister, your husband is an extremely prepared man to assume the leadership of any of our churches, since he has been working with us for a long time, he has theological training, he is cultured, he has a lot of knowledge in the Holy Scriptures as well as in several secular areas why all this fear?

—  Pastor Miguel, I appreciate your interest in helping us, but we cannot accept your invitation

— Good heavens, my brother, so you do not feel able to conduct the work in one of our temples even with all the knowledge and experience you have? Pastor, when we talked about the possibility of being appointed to the ministry to be consecrated as the pastor of one of our churches, I told him as soon as that would not be possible, as I am an employee of a company with many schedules to comply with, I would not have enough time to act in leading the house of God

— Correct, but we agreed to place at his side an auxiliary pastor to take over the congregation, when the brother needed to be absent, to be late for services or to do any other office with the members and department leaders, in fact his greatest commitment in the work it would be only on weekends where together with his wife he would make some visits to the sick, take a word of encouragement to the weakest in the faith. Conduct Sunday School on Sunday mornings, evening services, etc ... These tasks will be in progress full agreement with your available time, my beloved brother, no reason to refuse to assume this responsibility.

— Okay, Pastor, then we will do it the way you propose

— Very well, I await your presence on Saturday afternoon, starting at fourteen at the State Convention to introduce you to the president there and start the consecration ceremony, our elders will lay hands on the brother and consecrate him to the pastorate

— But, Vinícius, you can't ...

— Calm down, baby, I know what I'm doing!

— Is there a problem that I need to know my sister?

— No, Pastor, if my husband decided to accept your proposal, all right, surely he knows what he does

— Stay calm sister, Brother Vinicius is more than capable of assuming this responsibility

After that conversation between me and our group Shepherd he withdrew and alone my wife and I started to discuss the decision that according to her would have been hasty, because there was a serious undisclosed secret that could bring us serious in the future problems, as it actually brought.

— Are you crazy, man, how could you accept a commitment of this magnitude if you know about our situation?What will you do when the  ministry finds out that we are not legally married.And that you have already had another wife. Do you forget that in the Assembly of God they do not agree that a church member should be consecrated to the pastorate under these conditions? We will be ashamed before the whole congregation, expelled from the positions that we may be assuming, we will become a great scandal, a joke for those who today praise us!

— You know how much I dreamed and fought to win this position, woman, to become the pastor of the church where I accepted Christ and exercised all the minor ecclesiastical positions. Therefore, reaching the highest point of leadership will be a great victory for all of us, for me, you and our children.

— What I can see in the very near future is you and your family being reasons for ridicule in front of a people who do not know how to forgive this type of attitude, you know that very well!

— Honey, I know the risks, but I intend to face them anyway!

—Why don't you wait a little while longer to see if your ex-wife finds her and gets her a divorce? That way we can get married and the problem will be solved

— I don't know where she is and how long it will take me to locate her. In addition to what I already gave my confirmation to the pastor and in eight days we will have to participate in the convention for the consecration ceremony to receive our pastorate. We will not be missing in any way, because I will not act like a kid!

— Look, do as you see fit, but make sure it doesn't end well!

— Sometimes that pessimism of yours irritates me!

Lourdes was a woman thirteen years younger than me, she did not have much study or knowledge about the Scriptures, due to a serious mental disorder that she had as a child she found it difficult to continue studying and did not even complete elementary school. However, she was a good companion, an excellent mother. On top of that, she had a keen perception of the dangers that could happen in the future, which would very soon be fulfilled in our lives.

— There you come with your scary prophecies, Lourdes, for the love of God have more faith!

— I think we are not needing more faith at this time, but divine mercy, because only the Lord will be able to deliver us from the worst that is to come!

— Beloved God, how much pessimism, woman!

Eight days passed when we could hardly sleep properly, me out of anxiety and my wife out of fear of the consequences of my hasty actions. Finally, the day and time for us to attend the consecration ceremony that would take place at the time of the Convention of the Assemblies of God of the State of Pará comes.

 When we arrived there, together with four other nominees, to assume the same ecclesiastical function  We were taken to the upper wing of the building where the anointing oil was spilled on our heads in the presence of several ministers of the Gospel and our wives, no one there even imagined anything about my irregular situation and even I could not think about the huge mistake that I committed. Because I was totally ecstatic with that long-awaited event that was to be consecrated to the pastorate.After the ceremony, we participated in a cocktail party in the company of the brothers.

 And were greeted by the presidents of the Convention and the field where we congregated. We received the necessary guidance on the next steps to be followed from that moment and how we would exercise our new functions. All the other women followed their spouses with a wide smile on their faces.

 However, Lurdes remained with an air of fear stamped on her face in the expectation that at any moment the floor under our feet would give way and we would be largely ashamed, she felt that that dream would not last long, something warned her about it. At first it seemed that she was just frightened by the changes, but it was God's warning.

— Congratulations, Pastor Vinícius, from now on you will be an ecclesiastical authority in the middle of the church!

— Thank you, Pastor Miguel, I am honored

— Too bad he will remain as an auxiliary pastor in his church by his own choice, my wish was for him to assume the general leadership and not to stay in the background

— It's okay, Pastor, it was my choice and you need not worry. I will take the opportunity to learn a little more how to deal with the flock of Christ so that when I take full leadership I can have more experience

— You are more than ready, man, you don't need to learn anything else!

— My brother, Jesus, even though he was God and possessed of extreme wisdom. He waited patiently for thirty years before beginning his ministry. As a preacher, pastor, prophet and Lord of his disciples. Why, then, would I believe that I don't need to learn a little more?

— Wise words, pastor, it would be good for everyone to think so!

— I, in particular, thought that my husband should have waited for his moment outside and not in here

— Sister Lurdes, always replying to her husband's decision!

— It is certainly because I must have my reasons, pastor

— Leave it, pastor, Lourdes is like that, always in a bad mood! Maybe she is just worried

— Don't worry, dear brother, I know how women are!

— Machismo now, Pastor Miguel?

— None of that, my sister, is just the purest truth because you women are really quite pessimistic about the future

— We will see, pastor, we will see ...

None of us knew it at the time, but up there it seems that someone heard my wife's words and shouted a very strong amen, as everything would end up fulfilling as she predicted. As soon as the church became aware of my promotion, it divided into two distinct groups, those who supported us and came to greet us and the other who seemed to want to swallow us alive.  

Most of the workers who, like me, worked in the congregation in ecclesiastical functions with less emphasis.  Such as deacons, coordinators, professors or department leaders. However, with more time of activity they revolted and together with their wives, children and other relatives started to harass us. We were visibly criticized, despised and rejected by all of them. Annoyed to see that Lourdes was now the second lady of the church, as her husband was the second pastor.

 Several sisters began to hate her and turned their backs on them during the services and meetings that took place in the temple, even our children were martyred by jealousy that has taken over your hearts. This led my wife to throw me in the face, which had previously warned me that it would happen.

However, my superiors asked for calm and remembered that not even Jesus Christ pleased everyone. In order to support me, Miguel and others who were on our side were trying as best they could to remedy the situation. The anger of our enemies was even greater when we were honored before our president.

This happened after we completed our Theology course at the Seminary with great success in relation to the other students, receiving applause and honors from all over the ministry for the beautiful result. After this event, I started to be assigned to preach the Word of God in several other congregations. We traveled to other cities, participated in important congresses and I was already on the verge of going to another state.

All these advantages and privileges further ignited the envy of the false brothers. Who for many years pretended to love and respect us as partakers of salvation in Christ Jesus.  A year after being consecrated to the pastorate, Lourdes and I created a school for training in biblical knowledge in order to help those brothers, and sisters to have a better understanding of the Scriptures and to facilitate their performance in leadership.

We did not charge monthly fees and the personal investment of each one in the studies was only in the purchase of didactic material. Which unfortunately would become unviable if it were at our discretion.

 Because the bookstore that supplied us with the magazines demanded cash payment, thus, each student bought his material and in this way the final value did not become too high Even with all the theological capacity that we had acquired some still asked if we were really prepared to teach our students, doubting that we were up to it.

However, as if we shut the mouth of our opponents, we teach classes periodically throughout the year and after twelve months we were already gathered in the main temple participating in a service in thanksgiving for the training of more than one hundred students of the first class of trainees of our Bible school.

The diplomas were delivered by our president in the presence of a crowd of spectators. The event, which had an expressive number of brothers belonging to various ministries and churches, aroused in them the desire to participate in our classes the following year and in a short time we were forced to expand the school with nuclei in other congregations, hiring new teachers. Meanwhile, both Lourdes and I were asked to preach the Gospel in several new events.Our presence was requested on several occasions, we gave lectures, participated in seminars, theological debates, symposia, etc.

 While our enemies were bitterly jealous of our growth in the work of God, the Lord opened new doors for us and in a short time we were already at the top.  Causing even more revolt in us because of incapacity or lack of faith and self-effort they were not even able to reach us. imitate.But as my mother used to say, envy is one of the most powerful spells And we must be extremely careful when we find ourselves in its sights. Two years later we were asked to attend a meeting at the Convention where we received a warning from our superiors that terrified my wife even more.

 It was a call for us to receive the total leadership of one of the churches in the field where we worked, from that day on I would permanently assume my pastorate and would no longer be an auxiliary, but the definitive pastor of the evangelical community.

— Vinícius, think well my love, are you sure you want to continue with this absurd idea of ​​shepherding the church aware of our situation?

— Lourdes, after we have been acting as pastors for so long and the Lord has not allowed us to be ashamed, do you really think that if we accept this new proposal we will fall from grace before our God? If he were not with us, we would never have made it here without some stumbling block in our way, have faith my dear!

— I don't know, but I'm worried

— Actually, you are fearing the wrath of our enemies, of those who wish to see our fall, our failure because they were not chosen by God to go further in their work, but I am fully convinced that as long as we remain faithful to he will never perish before those who aspire to see our failure

— I hope you are right, because otherwise our plummet will be great!

— You sometimes think, speak and act like the Israelites in the desert, always doubting divine providence, murmuring, fearing the worst!

— But it is logical that I worry, because unlike you I have my feet firmly on the ground, I do not live in the world of the moon, ignoring the dangers that surround us! You sometimes behave in such an idiotic way that you don't even seem to have that much intelligence!

— Miguel was right, women are too negative!

— Wake up, man, we are in an irregular situation, because we are not truly married! Imagine what will happen to us when they discover that we have lied!

— A person cannot be forbidden to serve God just because he does not have a role in his hands that defines him as married or single, we live in a stable union for more than fifteen years and if they evaluate themselves they will see that we are much more worthy to serve Christ. than many of those who signed a marriage pledge before a judge

— Make no mistake, my husband, the pastors who make up the ministry of our church do not see things that way, as soon as they know of our situation they will expel us from our duties

— By then I will have divorced my ex-wife!

— But how do you intend to succeed in this case if you haven't even gone after her? Do you expect her to come here to give you the freedom she needs?

— You well know that I did what I could to find her, but to no avail. Furthermore, I am currently extremely busy to continue looking for her, I hope to God that she will appear or someone will give me some clue as to her whereabouts.

— Well know that your inertia will still bring you serious consequences! Remember that the devil, our worst enemy does not sleep and chases us day and night

When Lourdes opened his mouth to curse anyone, it was as if God or the devil confirmed it below. Evil ended up appearing in one way or another. Being a Christian I had some ideological contrasts that led me to believe what science says and some modern lines of thought.  One of them is the affirmation that we are what we think we are, that is, if we continuously think about success we will obtain victories, but if we only believe in failure, that will be our legacy.

Even insisting on the idea that our secret would never be revealed to the declared enemies since we were provided to the pastorate, they met constantly in order to find a way to incriminate me for any mistake made within my ministry and thus cause our expulsion from the important position. that from then on we would exercise inside the church where we congregated, it  was then that apparently Satan put in one of their minds the evil plan to trap me.

 Sending a beautiful young woman of just eighteen years to ask for work together with me in the school of biblical studies that I and Lourdes created in order to prepare our children. brothers in Christ to exercise their leadership roles in their departments with greater theological capacity. Nilce was a beautiful, polite girl, with curly and blond hair.

 A beautiful smile accompanied by a lot of charisma. She always kept me down to earth when it came to dealing with the female audience, remembering my commitment to my wife, family and especially the Lord's church to avoid scandals. However, as soon as I saw her I felt my heart flutter, it felt like she wanted to get out of her chest. I was paralyzed and I felt in my limbs an extraordinary excitement. It was as if my feet were suspended from the ground.

 And my mind was momentarily disconnected from reality, making me forget the serious risk I was facing in the face of such beauty.  She came into my office that Sunday morning, came over and greeted me with the peace of Christ as was the custom for everyone with her brothers in the faith.  I was ecstatic, perplexed, dominated by the red color of his full lips, the brown of his eyes, the pair of fleshy legs, his upturned butt ...

— The Lord's peace, pastor, do you have a minute?

— Peace in Christ, my sister, come in and sit down. How can I be of service to you?

— Pastor, recently finished my high school of Theology and would like to be part of the staff of teachers here at your Bible School, because that way I will put into practice what I learned in the seminary, in addition to what I can be very useful in the work of God.

— Young lady, you need to be aware that our work at this school is voluntary, we do not pay salaries to any of the teachers who work with us.

— I know that, pastor, don't worry. My goal is to contribute to the work of the Lord Jesus, the reward will come from him and not from men

— Very well, my sister, if so, we have a place for you in the new class of students that we will start next month. If in fact you are interested, stop by the secretary right now and talk to the person in charge so that she can prepare the necessary documentation for your entry into this course.

— Perfectly, pastor, I will go there right now!

After calling the secretary and informing about the service to our new volunteer. I was thinking about the impact that this beautiful woman had on me, immensely disturbing my emotional structure. When I returned home, I could not hide from Lourdes that something abnormal had happened to me, although I tried very hard to try to hide the reality of the facts from her.

— Something happened at school, baby, do you look tense?

— No, it's all right, don't worry!

— Okay, I just had the impression that you were worried about something

— Your impression, I'm fine!

The truth was that in no way could I let my wife know that from then on I would be interested in another woman, as this was something very serious, since it would be a case of adultery that could not only destroy our married life, but marry a tremendous scandal among the evangelical community. God deliver us from such a terrible and devastating evil, it would be the height of our worst pains, a great shame.

— Pastor Miguel called, wants you to contact him immediately

— Okay, I'll call him after the shower

— Don't delay, I'll set the table for lunch. Children, get out of the pool, come in clean clothes and set the table for lunch! Hurry up, we're waiting!

— Yes, mom, already

During the bath I spent a long time under the shower, trying to erase from my mind that charming girl who seemed to bewitch my heart. However, it seemed impossible to forget her. Outside, in one of the rooms of the house, Lourdes and the children awaited my presence so that we could participate together in the meal as usual, as it was I who usually offered the prayer of thanks to God.

— Come on, man, the food is getting cold!

— I'm going, baby, wait just one more minute!

I finally managed to get out of the bathroom, put on fresh clothes and approached the table to have lunch with my family. The weeks passed slowly for me due to the anguish waiting for the day when that charming young woman would enter my office for the second time to start her volunteer work at our school.

  My nights too became too long, a terrible insomnia prevented me from I closed my eyes and walked around the house at dawn as if I were a lost soul.  Miguel had requested my presence every Monday at the headquarters Congregation of the group  where I pastored to be the official preacher of the night, it was an important activity that before was divided among all the workers, but that from then on only I would do.

That change caused a huge revolt in the other pastors who started to hate me even more, increasing in them the desire to destroy my career at any cost.  The evil plan to make me fail in the face of Nilce's beauty was working, because in fact I shivered at the base as soon as I was before her extreme beauty. They weren't aware of it yet, but I was hoping that I would take the bait as soon as possible. I couldn't understand how it could be happening to me, since I had already encountered so many beautiful, fascinating women and I never wanted them.  

Then, after a profound reflection, I remembered what the Scriptures say about such an immoral woman who stumbled for Christians, leading many men to destruction in the early church.  Was I facing a similar fact? Would I have met a woman on my long journey whose purpose would be to trip my feet, throwing me into the deepest precipice?

 The truth did not know, but in a way I was being warned by the Lord, I should have given credit to the awakening of the Spirit, I dedicated myself more to prayer, watching over the usual, remembering that the devil does not sleep. On one occasion, the apostle Paul warned the Corinthian brothers: "He who, therefore, who cares to be on his feet, look, do not fall."  I made a lot of mistakes for forgetting this orientation.

 Because if I was alert to this detail, I might not have tripped over a stone. In the weeks that followed, Nilce remained giving classes every day in the Bible course and my eyes were fixed steadily on his fleshy buttocks. They moved up and down with each step she took, her large, hard breasts swaying under her blouse from the absence of a bra, her two pairs of legs, which were both thick and delicate, were a real perdition for any man who admire. Really, I have to admit that I was completely lost in the face of that spectacular but poisonous woman. She noticed my admiration for her her beauty, my carnal interest.

 She knew that she had already bewitched me with her charm and it was only a matter of time before I completely fell at her feet.  That ark gun had been bought by the workers of the curse, envious, eager to destroy me morally. Her mission of hers was to make me stumble in an insane act of adultery so that they could accuse me before my superiors. With that they would be able to tarnish my good reputation.  To put those who admired me against me, losing their trust. Going to the limit of being expelled from the ecclesiastical ministry of which he was a part.

It turns out that when we are blinded by the desire of our hearts and with that we move away from communion with the Holy Spirit.  Distancing ourselves from God and his protection, we are vulnerable, unprepared to deal with evil, with the traps of darkness, inevitably falling in the most complete disgrace.In the face of this one morning while we were dealing with subjects related to the classes she was supposed to teach in the course of the following week, being alone in my office, we became so close that I could feel the sweet breath in her mouth and her breath.

 A shiver went up from my feet to my head, causing the sin of sexual immorality to manifest in my lower limbs in the form of extreme excitement. A huge lust took over my body and I wanted to kiss his mouth immensely, our eyes met in silence that lasted a few minutes while I handed him the folder with documents.  Those yellowish eyes, her full, naturally red lips, the silky, soft, smooth skin, the blond, curly hair that moved slowly under the breath of the light breeze coming from the window next to me drove me crazy. Nothing happened between us at that moment.

Not even a peck, a hug, or any intimate involvement because we heard footsteps in the corridor and realized that we were not alone. However, after recovering from the situation, we sat down and started talking about the episode, as she realized it was time to put her evil plan of conquest into action.

— I realized how much you want me, pastor, stop trying to resist what your heart asks for. I am also attracted to you and I really want to live this feeling intensely

— Please, young man, stop it, don't you see that I am a married man and that this would lead to a great sin before the eyes of God and a huge scandal before the church?

— Jesus said that it is enough to wish in the heart and has already adulterated

— Yes, but we will not take this forward, I do not intend to destroy my family or my reputation as pastor of this church

— Well know that I will not give up having him in my arms no matter what!

— Don't be hasty my sister, let's forget how we feel for each other and what happened today in this place

— I told you, pastor, I won't give up on you or our love so easily!

The young woman left my presence apparently determined to have an intimate involvement with me and that attitude only increased the passion that burned inside my chest, I felt valued, desired, it was as if it were being a trophy that she wanted so much to win. However, I did not know that it was all pure deception.  A hoax plotted by my opponents in order to make a pit under my feet.

Upon leaving there, Nilce went to the residence of Deacon Amilton Pinheiro in order to pass on the latest information about her performance in the mission she had been assigned to perform. He was a respected member of the local ministry in the Castelo Forte congregation, where Lourdes and I were stationed as pastors and together with other elements sought to demoralize myself before the church. With his false appearance of humility, he speaks softly, wearing a mask of a man who is whole and dedicated to his family. he was part of the scheme.

— Good morning, Brother Amilton, I bring you news!

— Speak softly, young lady, be discreet. How are things going between you and Pastor Vinícius, is our plan working?

— Yes, brother, he fell right into the trap

— Didn't I say it would work? Besides being a beautiful young woman, you are also very intelligent. Soon we will have in our hands enough evidence to take this little pastry truffle out of our midst

— Yes, because we all understand that the position of leader of our church should be given to you, brother, and not to him

— But come on, tell me what happened …

— Of course, I'll let you know all the details

The malicious woman told her contractor in detail everything that had happened between us while dealing with matters relating to her work as a teacher at my Bible study school. She went so far as to exaggerate the truth of the facts, leading her mentor to have the idea that it would be fatal to my moral downfall. Not that for my enemy archer this would be a problem, on the contrary, it helped and very

— Young lady, through everything I have just heard I come to the conclusion that to reach our final goal it will only be enough for the sister to be able to record an audio with the conversations that will take place in the future between you and Pastor Maurício, that way we can accuse you of harassment and present the recordings as irrefutable evidence to the general ministry of the church, that way not even a miracle will free you from the fall

— That's right, Brother Amilton, I will do exactly as you are suggesting. However, before there is a small problem to be solved, it is that my cell phone is not modern and does not record audio with good quality

— As for that don't worry, tomorrow I'll be giving you a cell phone with all the technology you need to collect the information you need

— Well, so you can be carefree that everything will work out

— I am aware that yes, young lady, I trust in your ability

— So you don't have to worry, I know how to act!

Innocent as to what was being prepared for me, I remained in love with the beautiful girl with curly hair and brown eyes, wishing every minute I could kiss her, hug her body.  Feel her warmth, quench my sexual thirst in her most intimate parts, possessed it in its entirety. Sin had already taken over me, imaginations contaminated by the most impure fantasies dominated my mind, the darkness succumbed to me

At home I tried my best so that Lourdes would not perceive anything, but it is impossible to hide the darkness in which we find ourselves in the eyes of those who remain in the light and not only it, but also the whole church began to perceive the absence of the Holy Spirit in my life.  Through my cold words, without any effect or power; empty preachings; the prayers without the anointing that would cause God's action on the listeners I was spiritually dead and this became evident to everyone at each service ministered; in the course of each sermon given; at ministerial meetings; in the lead; in the examples given.  

Some wondered what had happened to me, whether I was experiencing a family or health problem, or was the burden of responsibility imposed on my shoulders even though I was not the senior pastor of the church. Others asked if it was not the fact that I had committed any sin. Under the question of many of the sisters in the Lourdes ladies department.  She came to me to ask for explanations about the current situation of low productivity in my activities carried out in the local congregation, which left much to be desired.  Since I was always a source of praise from the community, mainly with regard to the sermons given during the services where he showed me quite eloquently.

— After all, what is happening to you, man, what discouragement is this in everything you have done in the congregation? He no longer preaches the Word with that anointing before, his prayers are empty of power, the church no longer feels the presence of God during his ministries.  Explain to me the reason for all this, where does so lack of courage when preaching the message

— It's nothing, baby, I'm just a little tired with so many commitments

— Also, it is not for less, they keep sending you here and there to preach in so many events that I do not know how you are still standing! I will have a good conversation with Pastor Miguel to reduce these commitments further, you need rest

— Please, Lourdes, leave Miguel out of it

— But how can I leave out the person responsible for all this physical wear and tear that is taking his focus off the work of God? There are already people doubting your holiness before God, baby, you know how some brothers tend to think about it

— Think what you want, these vultures!

— It turns out that things are not quite like that, Vinícius, you know that

— Yeah, I know, especially those who live looking for a way to demoralize me and the worst of it is that now they can do it due to my enormous weakness, But it will only really happen if they discover my mistake!

— Yes, then try to compose yourself and go back to acting as the true minister of the Gospel that you always were. For weeks now, the services you have taught are nothing more than cold and unpleasant meetings, which I have never witnessed before, take time off from other activities and dedicate yourself more to the local church, as this is very necessary!

— You are right, I will do this as soon as possible, thank you for waking me up, because in fact I hadn’t realized it

Even against my will Lourdes had a frank conversation with my superior and he gave me a month's leave on trips to other congregations congresses and other activities all to be able to rest, but this is not the problem that would be leaving me so extinguished in front of my listeners but the sin that kept me from being used by the Lord. A few days later, Nilce acquired my cell phone number and started calling me frequently at dawn at a specific time to tell me about his feelings, his intense passion and the uncontrollable desire to surrender entirely.

Our conversation always took place after midnight, when Lourdes slept heavily after a day of a lot of housework and care for our three children. She was lying on her bed and I was hiding inside the bathroom from where we exchanged intimate hints. Warmed the ardor of our desires and talked about how we planned to own each other under the sheets. It turns out that I didn't even imagine that all that conversation was being recorded to serve as evidence against me in the very near future.

Nilce was really smart, smart, calculating. She always let the realization hang in the air that it was me and not she who proposed everything. Of course, that was the objective, the main target, everything should put me in a guilt scenario as the one and most responsible for our case. For the involvement of that young woman in the practice of a shameful act, involving herself with an older and above all married man. Certainly the pit was already being dug, my feet ran towards it along the path of doom, the snare was prepared.

 One Sunday morning, after Sunday School, Nilce asked me to assist her in one of the congregation's rooms, claiming that she needed pastoral counseling, which I did immediately. At that moment, I just wanted to risk stealing a kiss, a hug, or going further, it was customary for the pastor to attend to the sisters with the presence of another worker, but I preferred to speak to him alone.

My wife soon went home to do her household chores, prepare lunch and feed our hungry children. The young woman and I stayed in one of the temple facilities. As soon as we realize we are alone, we lock the door, so if we surrender to each other with a thirst for unparalleled pleasure.  Totally dominated by the evil influence, the intensity of how we got involved there was so intense and unrestrained that we went completely crazy. We forgot to be in the house of God and started to take off our clothes.

 We undressed quickly and after laying her on a fully open and available table for easy vaginal penetration I pushed my totally rigid member, burning with lust, reaching the most depth of his cave with each thrust, each sharp blow. Each levered with that varnished mast that was almost impossible to disarm. We had anal, vaginal, oral sex and she even made me go to the heights by drinking the milk that comes out of my penis, something that in years of marriage I had never had such an experience with my wife  

That she was so withdrawn in terms of sex that she didn't even accept giving one. suck. As can be seen, I was completely involved with that prostitute who, possessed by a demon, managed to arrest me and her immoral acts, corrupting the sanctity that existed in my being before.   Ending that immoral practice, we cleared our consciences with the idea that everything was just a gesture of love.

I returned home after satisfying the infamous desires of my flesh and went unnoticed by Lourdes who was all lost in her affairs, gave a kiss to each of the children and went to the bathroom to wash the filth of my limbs. In the afternoon I went to participate in a lecture where I brazenly spoke to the listeners about the duty to remain worthy. Always cleansed from sin, quoting Ecclesiastes, who said:  “Your clothes are white at all times, and never let the oil run out on your head”, as an incentive for the youngest to flee from sexual immorality and everything related to sin , I spoke of these things to a vast number of girls and boys.When in reality hours ago I had wet myself with the filthy liquid from the vagina of a bitch of the worst kind. I was wrong to realize that I had practiced all that naughtiness, but it seemed that no one was aware of my little shame.

 I forgot the omniscience of God, that the eyes of the Most High cover the whole earth and its fullness. At the end of the lecture, I returned home where I remained completely disconcerted in front of the wife, while unaware of my rascals she rehearsed with the children the hymn with which they would perform in the church choir that Sunday night.  

My conscience warned me about the future consequences of my insane acts. But I refused to listen to her voice, because a spirit of rebellion hardened my heart, to my utter disgrace on the morning of that day. When Nilce invited me to go to that room where she said she needed pastoral guidance and there we unabashedly prostituted ourselves, she had put her cell phone on with the camera on just minutes before.

  She recorded the whole episode and afterwards she took the device to Amilton who copied the immoral scene and kept it in her evidence files against me, with which it would already be possible for him to gather his supporters and present it to Miguel or directly to the Ministerial Council of mine. sinful conduct.

Requesting my expulsion from the position of pastor of the church, in addition to asking that I be definitively exonerated from the Convention where I was ordained to the pastorate, however, for him there still seemed to be little evidence obtained.   Because his intent was not just to take away the right to pastor a church, blinded by sin, unable to see a span in front of the nose.  Completely dominated by evil, I went ahead with my madness,  besides that Sunday morning when I screwed like a horny stud with that fleshy vagina filly, white on the outside and red inside.

 Throbbing with lust, I had several other similar occasions.  Several times we met in motels and there we had a sexual dispute over beds that had previously been the scene of the relationship of so many others.  In Christian doctrine it is taught that the Christian must avoid sin in all its forms.  

Follow the example of King David who wrote in the Psalm first:  "Blessed is the man who does not walk according to the advice of the wicked, nor stand in the way of sinners, nor sit in the circle of scoffers." I was an evangelical pastor, I studied theology until I reached the maximum level. I knew all the rules applied to Christians according to biblical norms, the limit to where to go.

 What to avoid in daily life, how to behave in front of the church and the world around.  It was unforgivable for me to behave before God and the people who once accepted me as their leader. Even drowned to the neck by the most complete filth of sin, by the spiritual leprosy that spread quickly through my rotten soul before God. I continued to shepherd that Christian community, pretending to be a holy man, faithful to the Lord Jesus and deserving of the respect of the faithful. The prostitute with whom I was involved also continued to work at school and in the congregation.

She acted shamelessly, exercising positions and functions acquired by donating her filthy body to a pastor who was spiritually dead and already rejected by the Savior. Like two adulterers without the slightest fear of divine punishment and reprimands, we continued our depravities for a long time without being discovered.

 And not even my enemies used all that information to destroy me.In fact, all that little shame took about a whole year, I came to believe that nothing and no one would ever find out what we were doing because God had given us time to repent, but his patience only encouraged us to continue in the practice of our deliberate and immoral acts. At the end of 2004, I was invited to attend a meeting at the Convention, there, I was informed by the Board of Directors that my family.

And I were going to be transferred from the current congregation where I served as an auxiliary pastor to a new evangelical community, where I would start to act as a greater leader. Fully assuming the leadership of the temple and the other workers there. I admit that I was extremely happy and proud with the promotion, it was the fulfillment of a long-awaited dream, but Lourdes did not feel the same happiness.

— Oh, my God, and now what do we do?

— As well, woman, you were supposed to be jumping with happiness, because finally we are going to shepherd our own flock!

— I don't know, I feel that this promotion will not do us good or bring good results

— You, always putting me down with your pessimism!

— Are you so blinded by the ambition of wanting to become a great Christian leader that you do not even realize the danger to which we are exposed, since we are going to get closer and closer to the danger of being unmasked before the church? Remember that nothing is permanently hidden from the eyes of God or his people, because his glory reveals all things!

— Stop being so afraid, woman, not everything that is written in the bible is really fulfilled!

— But what is this nonsense you're saying to me, man, have you lost your faith? Will you now doubt the Scriptures, what the Holy Spirit can do in our midst?

— Because I tell you clearly and without fear of making mistakes that not everything is revealed

— You may have just lost your mind completely!

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